It’s about that time!
Hot Girl Summer has come and gone, the “Act Up” rituals have diminished, and Mariah Carey is starting to make her yearly rounds in our playlist.
Cuffing Season is upon us.
For my more mature readers, if you don’t know what that is, it can be defined as “a specific time of year when people become extremely motivated to get “coupled up.””, according to Psychology Today.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with that.
It be cold outside, fam, we be wanting a cuddle partner that isn’t one of our teddy bears. (We all still have them, don’t flex, sis.)
However, it can be an extremely painful reminder for those of us who aspire a relationship, but feel we’re doomed to Singleville.
So, today’s post is dedicated to those people.
Although, it’s great to be independent and love on yourself, we all want someone to share that love with sometimes. And we all want to be a recipient of love, whether we care to admit it or not.
And it when that mood embodies someone, the cute little messages such as “your time will come” or “this just means you got to work on yourself more”, get real irritating, real quick.
Like, girl, ain’t nobody tryna hear that!
I done bought what feels like every self-love book, downloaded all the podcasts, went and listened to the church sermons, all that!
I am ready, God, soulmate me please!
But the devastating truth is that we aren’t ready.
Otherwise, it would’ve happened.
These realizations are always the hardest pills to swallow, having to acknowledge that we aren’t as far along as we think we are.
Especially when it feels like everyone around you is coupled up.
And the most frustrating part is that, most of the time, you feel fine!
You don’t second-guess your singleness; you feel good to not deal with the baggage.
But this seasonal loneliness, man, it’s a different beast.
You crave the baggage!
But one thing that’s helped me, was to look at all the things I didn’t have to do because I didn’t have a cuddle partner.
Not having to buy Christmas gifts is the first that comes to mind!
Like, sis, let me tell you I just spent a pretty penny on my boyfriend’s gifts (y’all know ya girl is boujie-broke), and whew.
I’m excited to see his face when he opens it and all because he really does deserve it, but my bank account is certainly in need of some therapy to get her through the loss (I’m so dramatic, haha).
Count your financial blessings, sis.
Relationships can be very expensive.
Having full control over holiday plans is another benefit!
There’s no compromising to be made about what holiday is spent where or trying to figure out travel plans so your schedules align.
I know of four people currently, who have been making couples New Year’s plans for the last two months, and STILL don’t know what we’re – oops, I mean they’re going to do.
Embrace your freedom of choice.
And yes, I’m going to be one of those people that sends an irritating message for the final benefit I’m going to cover today, so just suck it up!
You get more time to focus on your self-care.
Finding balance in relationships is hard and can be really stressful trying to be present for your significant other while not losing yourself.
This is one less thing to delegate on your priority list, enjoy that while it lasts.
I’m not going to lie and say it doesn’t make me feel good to know I have someone to share the season with, but it took a lot of lonely seasons to get here.
Embrace that time, it prepares you in the best way for the right person to fill that cuddle space in the future.
And just know that even though your romantic light may be a little dim, there is at least one person that is sending love to get you through this time, and that’s me.
So, let’s raise our glasses to the Savage Singles!
Sending air cuddles all across the way.